LogoDaedalus Returns From GenCon

LogoDaedalus is back, after an educational weekend of teaching seminars at GenCon, one of the largest -- if not the largest -- gaming conventions in the United States. The topics of the seminars were gaming, writing, libraries, and literacy, and I have new insights to share about writing and editing for games, and how to promote reading through gaming.

Far from destroying or distracting from reading in kids' lives, games of all varieties can encourage it -- the most serious players are also often the most avid readers. GenCon hosts and promotes board games, card games, miniatures, role-playing games, and video games, and all of them can improve literacy and encourage reading and a love of good storytelling, from story-focused RPGs like Ultima III, to the descriptions on Magic: The Gathering cards. And as someone who learned to type by playing text-adventure computer games like Zork, gaming and writing share a closely-related place in my heart.

For a list of recommended websites for gaming research, click here: Where To Find Games

Build Your Brain Through Gaming

Games don't have to rot the mind. Learning rules, observing patterns, thinking your way around obstacles, and practicing computation, memorization, language and social skills are all demonstrated benefits of playing games, from Settlers of Catan to Assassin's Creed. Furthermore, these cerebral power-ups are accessible to anyone, from young kids just beginning to read, to seniors keeping their faculties sharp, to the learning-disabled or challenged.  Or to introverted nerds who wouldn't otherwise socialize, or to military history buffs who find a fun way to pass on their knowledge to their kids, or to writers who need inspiration for a difficult film noir. Games contain knowledge and require skill, and they can make you smarter.

Pay Attention to the Story

An imaginative person can create intricate plots about the downfall of empires out of a game of solitaire, but great stories make great games and great memories. Make the stakes high, the opponents spectacular, and the choices agonizing. Just as video game soundtracks are now producing incredible symphonic, polyphonic compositions, so some of the best stories currently being told are coming through games, whether on a console, a tabletop, or a deck of cards. 

If you're creating a game, read books with similar settings and look for how you can use the setting, characters' perspectives, and the gameplay mechanics to create an intriguing narrative. If you're playing a game, watch for hints and foreshadowing -- and especially if you play traditional RPGs like D&D, don't just hack-and-slash your way through the campaign. It makes the DM sad.

Proofread Your Games

Edit, edit, edit. Manuals, packaging, in-game text, and the game's materials -- proofread it all. It would embarrassing to find out after the fact that you published a game called "Doom of the Drangon" (instead of "Dragon"), or described your characters' "Attaca Pionts" (attack points?), or referred to Aragorn as "Aragon" -- all typos I witnessed this weekend.

Especially if you're distributing to an international market, consult a proofreader who is an expert in the language of the country you're selling to. Amusingly bad translation mistakes like "Conglaturation!!! A Hero Is You!" or "All your base are belong to us" are notorious enough to have dance remixes on YouTube (although they did make Zero Wing much more memorable).  What's more, translation errors can make gameplay incredibly frustrating. One of my favourite video games had a boss battle during which a character shouted the warning, "Attack while its tail is up!"  It was supposed to say, "Don't attack while its tail is up."  I attacked, got creamed by the monster's laser counterattack, and barely avoided having all my fighters killed.

P.S. The highlight of this year's GenCon was watching Deadpool dancing with Mario and Luigi in front of the Klingon Opera.

He Said, She Said: Making Sense of Dialogue Tags

Most creative writing guides offer a list of synonyms for the word "said," to avoid monotony and allow more emotional expression in character dialogue. Instead of John said, Alice said, these guides suggest alternatives like John stammered, Alice scoffed, John gasped, Alice tittered. It's valuable advice -- in small doses.

Beginning writers tend to get carried away with the exciting new alternatives, replacing every instance of the word "said" with a more demonstrative verb, until their characters look like emotionally unhinged train wrecks. The end result is, at best, distracting; at worst, hilarious.  Compare the following two passages, one with boring he said, she said dialogue tags, and the other with excessive use of a thesaurus.

Passage #1:

"What do you think of it so far?" Alice asked.
"Well," said John, "I think it got off to a good start."
"Does that mean you didn't like the end?" asked Alice.
"Honestly?" John asked.
"Honestly," Alice said.
"I think it went downhill pretty fast," said John.
"You're right, it doesn't have much content," said Alice.
"I'm already bored," said John.

Passage #2:

"What could it be?" I questioned.
"I've never seen readings like this before," he babbled.
"It could be a sentient species," I hissed.
"Too bad we're too far from Earth to ever report our findings," he chortled.
"I wonder if we could ever communicate with another race," I confessed.
"Wait, I'm losing the signal," he whimpered.
"Try to triangulate its source using our trajectory," I roared.

The first example is acceptable, but leaves something to be desired. The characters are speaking in a vacuum. The second example picks dialogue tags pretty much at random; it makes the characters look insane and the author look like an amateur. Both are very common among novice writers, usually as a result of the writing advice they were given in secondary school, but by using elements of both, you can easily make your writing more sophisticated.

Here's a more specific, balanced guide to help you indicate who is speaking, without overwhelming the reader with your characters' theatrical speaking styles.

1. There's nothing wrong with "said" (or "asked").

Writing manuals warn that repeated use of "said" is too dull and monotonous, but perception studies have shown that readers barely even notice the word as their eyes skim over it. Like a punctuation mark, "said" is registered on an almost subliminal level, so the reader tracks the change in speaker but stays immersed in the dialogue. More forceful tags like hollered, spat, murmured, or pronounced disrupt a reader's attention, especially when the chosen tag is not a good match for the line.  And definitely be sparing with non-emotional synonyms for said, like stated, remarked, or disclosed. Those verbs belong in a scholarly or newspaper article.

2. Don't use a dramatic verb to prop up a weak line of dialogue.

The characters, not the narration, should carry the emotions of a scene. If you feel that you have to use a tag like stormed, sighed, or sobbed to convey the emotion and delivery of a line, see if you can make the line itself more powerful instead, through word choice and/or punctuation. 

Weak: "Get out, I don't want to see you anymore," Alice screamed and sobbed.
Stronger: "Out! Get out!" Alice sobbed. "I never want to see you again!"

3. Use the surrounding action to differentiate dialogue.

Give your narrative variety, and kill several birds with one stone, by using a character's motions, body language, or other descriptions to show who is speaking. This approach breaks up the monotony of a long dialogue, keeps the plot moving forward during conversations, and adds depth and vitality to a scene. Example:

Sam returned and set full tumblers of bourbon in front of each of them. "You'd better be careful who you tell your pet theories to. Clahan's a big name in this town, and he's not afraid to stamp out this kind of rumor at its source, if you follow me."
"But you believe me, don't you?" John's knuckles whitened on the arms of his chair, whiskey ignored for now. "This isn't just corruption, this is murder."
"Sure, but I'm not the one you have to convince." Sam swiveled his chair behind the desk, turning to look out over the skyline. "I'm retired, remember? I don't have any pull in this city anymore."

This approach allows forward motion, scenery description, and character development, and it should still be clear who is talking.

4. Avoid the truly ridiculous.

Don't confuse dialogue tags with facial expressions. Snidely Whiplash at his most dastardly couldn't actually sneer a line; that's an action, not a way of saying something. Likewise, grin, frown, scowl, and pout are not good dialogue tags. Keep the word if it fits, but phrase it correctly, as an action.

Good: John grinned. "So what did you bring me?"
Silly: "I knew you would bring me something," John grinned.

Be careful with animal, weather, and musical concepts. Roared, thundered, erupted, trumpeted, caroled, barked, and hissed are all highly vivid and melodramatic, but they only work if they are a truly perfect fit for the line. If your choice of such a tag is even a little off-target, your dramatic moment will read like a Madlib.

Good: "Rage, blow, you cataracts and hurricanoes!" roared King Lear into the teeth of the rising gale.
Silly: "I only have to work a half-day tomorrow," bugled the accountant.

No puns in dialogue tags. None. Aficionados of the ham-handed Tom Swift adventure stories may remember the groan-worthy puns that peppered each chapter; these were corny in the 1920s and they have not improved with time. Resist the temptation.

"We'd better run," he said evasively.
"There's no air in your tire," he said flatly.
"I'm trying to finish Old Yeller," he said doggedly.

Disclaimer: With the exception of the quote from King Lear, all dialogue samples in this post were created by the author expressly for this purpose. No other published works were quoted or copied.